( Explosion )
( machine-gun fire )
( shouting )
( gunfire )
( yelling in German )
Get those boats free!
Aah!
( Airplane approaching )
( incoming artillery )
Get back!
Aah!
Take it easy. No rushing.
In you get.
( Screaming )
I can't see!
Jesus Christ! Help me! Help!
My eyes! My eyes!
Jesus.
( Crew yelling )
Shh! Now you're all right.
Lie down, please.
Now lie down. You're all right.
Lie down. That's right.
That's right.
Mother of Christ, I itch.
Midges. Very nasty.
Hot summer.
What are you doing? Who are you?
I'm Dr. Hayden.
A lady doctor?
Now, facedown, please.
We'll see about those bites of yours.
Lady, I'm stark-bollocks-naked!
We're all god's children, Mr. Murphy
and I've seen plenty of backsides before.
You won't be beautiful for a while,
but around here it won't make any difference.
Where the fuck am I?
Somewhere where we try to avoid
that kind of language, Mr. Murphy.
You're at Curiapo Quaker Medical Mission.
There's nothing wrong with me foul language.
Other side, please.
Do you not have a gentleman doctor?
Other side, please.
Yes, sir.
Lucky only the midges bit you.
Now, the piranha fish would have
picked you clean down to the bones.
What are they doing?
Come on. Try and relax.
Relax? How can I relax
with that bunch gawking at me?
Well, that bunch, as you call them,
have never seen a naked white man.
Well, they've had their thrill for today.
Would you tell them to-- leave immediately.
( Speaking foreign language )
All things considered, Mr. Murphy,
I find your modesty rather touching.
I'm sure we're going to get on splendidly.
Splendidly, splendidly.
Right. There you are.
How do you feel now?
Marvelous.
Now, will you take this?
Holy--
You're a very lucky man.
You find anyone else?
We're still looking.
Poor suffering bastards.
I've been trying to radio a message
about you to Trinidad.
No luck yet, I'm afraid.
That's very unfortunate, but I'm in no rush.
Out there, they're killing people.
I'll try it again tomorrow.
What was the name of your ship?
The Mount Kyle.
If you must radio something,
tell them about that submarine.
And what submarine was that?
The ugly Bonn bastard that sank us.
Aye. It came up your river.
No. No, it didn't.
I saw it.
I think someone would have mentioned it.
I'm telling you,
it went straight past me.
Yes. Well, you've been in a coma.
It was probably an alligator.
Well, this alligator
had guns sticking from its nostrils.
Don't you worry about it. Try and get some sleep.
Whatever it was, it's gone now.
Oh, Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
She's a...
she's a charmer. She's beautiful.
Oh, holy. She's lovely.
Good for you.
Water.
( Speaking foreign language )
( ship's horn blowing )
( speaking foreign language )
( French accent ) oh! So... it's you.
So, you-- you've recovered.
Are you the fella that--
Yes! I found you.
God bless you.
I salute your deeds. Extraordinary.
Cigarette?
No, thank you.
From my position on the river,
I can look to sea.
Such a fight!
The flames visible for miles.
A touch?
Oh. Yeah.
And out of them, but one man emerges.
One man.
Oh! Truly heroic.
Nothing heroic, me old son.
It came natural. I was saving me own skin.
The name's Murphy.
Louis Brezan.
How are you?
Fine.
Been fishing?
No. I like to cook. I like to eat.
I don't like to fish.
Ahh.
What do you do here
when you're not cooking or eating?
You play cards?
Holy mother.
Would you ever take me for a trip?
Of course. It's a pleasure.
And then we can talk
about the British naval tradition, eh?
Naval tradition?
Yes.
Getting drunk and catching the clap.
For which I have the greatest regard.
It seems that this war will be over soon.
Today on the wireless,
they said Hitler has been killed.
Don't believe it.
He'll have nipped through the window.
How I envy you.
The hard glory of combat,
the exhilaration--ohh!
Man is only truly alive when he confronts death.
He can also be truly dead.
Such a bitter thing,
a man like me to be left in the backwash of the war.
I begged them let me face the German,
but no, no.
They insisted my place was here
in charge of the equipment.
I must admit, it is a very valuable equipment.
This?
No, no, no.
No. The wharf where I live.
I work for the oil company.
I've been left in sole charge.
There are Indians on the river
who would strip off every bolt
if they were not watched.
I know the feeling.
If it isn't nailed down, it's mine.
How deep is it?
Deep.
I personally supervised the dredging.
From the mouth of the river
to the headquarters of my company,
seagoing ships sailed.
Then a submarine could get up here.
Submarine?
A German submarine?
Why would one want to?
I'm only asking if it could.
Danke.
( Speaking German )
( engine running )
We have picked up a survivor
from the Mount Kyle.
He believes the German submarine
that sank the Mount Kyle
came up the river Orinoco.
He asked me to tell you this.
Half a tick! I think they've found somebody!
Well, now, lieutenant.
From your ship?
Yeah.
Oh, no. Murphy.
In the flesh.
Anyone else?
No.
Oh, god. It had to be you.
Did the U-boat give you a lift?
Don't be talking. Any half-decent officer
would have sunk the bastard submarine.
Mr. Murphy, would you please stop talking to him?
I beg your pardon.
This lady's a doctor.
She's a charmer. You'll love her.
Lieutenant: Murphy.
MURPHY: any complaints?
I managed to beach the plane.
Find her.
Bring her in.
In? The plane? Why?
Patch her.
Now, that's an order, Murphy.
Oh, well, now, I
Just bring her in, please!
Immediately, sir. Any notion where she is?
No, damn you, no.
Stop getting him excited.
Excited? Him?
Stupid-born English pillock.
Mr. Murphy, will you please shut up?
And when you're in the sun,
would you try to remember to wear something on your head!
Well, look after him. He's not a bad old--
You get out of the way,
and I will get on with my job.
It's no job for a woman.
Louis, you speak the lingo?
I speak 7 languages and 5 dialects.
French, German--
Just ask them
where the flaming aeroplane is.
Yeah.
( Crying )
( speaking foreign language )
( engines running )
ohh.
( Yelling in German )
( speaking foreign language )
( speaking German )
What is all this ridiculous--
Now, wait a minute!
Ich bin kapitan lauchs. Sprechen sie deutsch?
Fraulein? Frau?
Dr. Hayden.
Doktor, sprechen sie deutsch?
No, no. I'm afraid I
nein.
You have... enemy survivors here.
This is a hospital, captain.
I must know where--
hospital here.
Doctor.
No. He mustn't be moved.
He's badly hurt. Verboten move.
Please. I--I don't understand.
He's badly hurt. He's ill.
( Speaking German )
This is a hospital.
( Seaman speaking German )
( speaks German )
( speaking German )
But, captain!
( Door opening )
Necessity...
find... n-not to find.
Responsibility...
( speaking German )
( knock on door )
( door opens )
( crew member speaking German )
Good. ( speaking German )
Uhh!
Aah!
( Speaking German )
RADIO NEWSCASTER: Tonight, Air Force flyers
who have been cooperating
with the Third Army ground forces in Czechoslovakia,
and they give me a fantastic picture.
One of them told me he saw columns...
( man speaking foreign language )
( speaking foreign language )
...away from the Russians toward us.
In those columns, were both soldiers and civilians.
DR. HAYDEN: you were right.
There was a German submarine.
They came up here and shot him.
Bastards.
I'm bewildered, Mr. Murphy.
I mean, why...
what happened out there?
They shot the entire crew in the water.
Every suffering...
except me.
Flying jacket.
I didn't see that.
You weren't intended to.
He didn't want them to know there was an aeroplane.
Thank you, Flying Officer Murphy.
Cover him up and say some words.
He was a particular friend of yours?
An officer!
I got the impression you rather liked him.
MURPHY: come on, Louis! Take her up!
Easy, Louis!
Easy, eh?
Easy! Easy! Easy!
Wonderful!
Easy, Louis.
Good on you, Louis.
Your blood's worth bottling.
( Phonograph playing music )
You know machines?
What?
Do you know machines?
I love 'em.
MAN: ♪ I've got a feeling I've found her ♪
♪ It was something she said ♪
♪ She's got me walking on the tip of my toes ♪
♪ And my hat's on the side of my head ♪
♪ All of my troubles are mended ♪
♪ She's my needle and thread ♪
♪ She's got me walking on the tip of my toes ♪
♪ And my hat's on the side of my head ♪
( Phonograph stops playing )
( record playing )
♪ I've got a feeling I've found her ♪
♪ It was something she said... ♪
♪ All along Thomas Street ♪
♪ Down by the Liffey, the sunshine was gone ♪
♪ And the evening grew dark ♪
♪ Me arms were around her... ♪
Ahh! You're doing well, me old froggy.
The company'll give you a gold watch.
I shall be happy with my 4 years' back pay.
4 years? Louis: Yeah.
That's an awful lot of pennies.
You sure they're good for it?
It is a very reliable company.
I have full confidence in their integrity,
and if not,
I will write them a letter.
( Chuckles )
Louis: Can you fly?
Who do you think kept this flying lavatory together?
Every scrap of her is in me fingers.
Yes, but can you fly her?
Don't worry, my old son. I'll get her up.
And if you do?
I'll find that bastard Bonn submarine.
What about getting her down?
That I know I can do.
Forgive me,
but are you sure that, uh... hmm?
Stop blathering, or the war will be over
before I do anything! Now, shut up
and cast me off.
Madness.
Come on.
Swing me around.
( Engine sputtering )
Fly, you bastard! Fly!
( Engine stalls and sputters )
Ohh.
( Engine stalls )
( engine resumes )
( speaking German )
( alarm ringing )
Oh, Louis, Louis, Louis!
The feeling! Oh, Jesus!
No submarine?
You see, you're flying.
Y-you're a bird!
But you didn't find the submarine?
Certainly I found her. It's up the river.
But they didn't see you?
Certainly they saw me.
Now, a couple of things to do.
Some kick, and then I'm going back.
For what purpose are you going back?
I'm going to sink her.
( Imitating airplane )
You see, I got it up over the trees--
But you have no weapon.
Petrol.
The bitch keeps trying to drag you down,
but if you give her a bit more stick,
just like a woman--
Petrol? Yeah, petrol.
What are you going to do with petrol?
A bit more throttle, you see?
They have guns on the submarine?
Yeah, a big bastard in the front
and a little fellow aftwards.
Up she goes!
And of course they will let you
pour petrol all over them
and then watch you put a match to it?
They might. They might just do that.
They might? They might, yes.
Your lack of common sense...
Here.
Morning, sir.
What are you doing?
Just borrowing a couple of your bottles.
Hmm. What on earth for?
I'm refueling the plane. Then I'll be flying off.
I take it your experiments
with the plane were successful.
Great. Great.
Have you been taking your tablets?
Oh, yes.
Well, then...
there's really nothing to keep you, is there?
How soon will you be going?
Shortly.
I'd be so grateful if you'd do something for me.
I'll make a list of things we need here.
Would you be good enough to take it with you?
Oh, certainly.
Oh, that's marvelous. Thank you very much.
( Whistling a tune )
( phonograph playing )
( whistling )
Ok, Louis.
We'll time her.
Louis, the doctor lady-- she's a Quaker.
Mm-hmm.
That's like being a bloody nun, isn't it?
No. I don't think so.
Why couldn't she be a young nurse,
something practical?
Light the fuse, please.
She has fair form.
Do you ever have any, uh...
5 seconds.
Ever take a crack?
I have great respect for her.
Now.
I provide an essential service
by piloting her from here to there in my boat.
6 seconds.
6 seconds?
3 1/2 feet at...
and that's about 9 inches a second.
We'll try the long fellow.
See if it stays the same.
How long you been here, Louis,
on your lonesome?
Oh, about 6 1/2 years now.
6 1/2 years?
That's an awful long time.
I've known fellas without it
for 6 months go bald.
8 seconds.
Bald?
This is not my property.
The company only uses explosives
in case of oil fire.
Exactly.
Murphy!
Ah, shut up!
What will I say to my company?
( Indistinct arguing )
Be careful, Murphy.
Don't worry.
I know what I'm doing.
How did you learn to make bombs?
By watching me daddy
who made them for noble causes.
Now hold that there.
D-don't!
You'll have the whole of it scuttled.
On the radio,
they say they are surrendering everywhere.
It's only a question of hours now
before peace is declared.
They say the Italians--
It works! It works!
Ok, my son.
Hello.
That's a delightful hat you're wearing, Mr. Murphy.
You like it?
I always did.
Ought to nail it down.
Here it is.
You see, I've listed everything
in order of priority.
One--
see that's delivered
to the Society of Friends in London.
Rightcha.
2--tell your people it's imperative
we have a new transmitter.
Rightcha.
3-- Jesus.
Take your tablets.
Now.
If I were you, Missis, I wouldn't stand there.
This fella makes an awful clattering.
Oh, yes. Certainly.
Away you go, Louis!
( Crane engine starts )
Good luck.
MURPHY: Thank you.
Ok, Louis, take her up!
What are the bottles doing there, Louis?
Bottles?
Louis: those are the world's largest
Molotov cocktail bombs.
Bombs?
Come on, Louis!
Take her up! Take her up!
But what are they for?
He intends to drop them on the submarine.
He's mad.
Ok, Louis! Swing her out!
DR. HAYDEN: Murphy!
You can't do this!
Why not?
Louis, stop that thing!
Louis, start that thing!
This is pointless!
The war is almost over.
Listen to her, Murphy.
She may be right.
Louis, if you don't lower me down,
I'll gut you!
No, Louis! Don't!
This is so wrong!
Tell that to the bastards on the bottom of the ocean!
DR. HAYDEN: I know how you feel.
And what they did was dreadful,
but one senseless killing after another--
Killing? If I'm lucky.
And if you're not lucky,
have you thought what might happen to us?
Don't worry, Missis!
There'll be nothing left of them Germans but shite!
DR. HAYDEN: you're enjoying it!
That's right!
You love your war, don't you?
The war?
Yeah.
I started the whole flaming thing, didn't I?
Will you think?
Don't worry, Missis.
It isn't really a submarine.
It's just a little old alligator, remember?
You mindless bastard!
( Speaking German )
( alarm ringing )
( speaking German )
( gunfire )
( engine sputtering )
I sunk the whore, Louis.
The whole flaming thing, up in the air!
Yes, I know. She told me.
She told you?
She stuck a blunt needle in me.
You can help me raise him, Louis.
Mm-hmm.
Gently does it.
Wh-wh-what's going on now?
You have a fractured rib.
Keep still. Thank you, Louis.
Put your arms out.
Ahh, Louis,
you should have been there.
It was beautiful.
I wish I had been there.
Aah! Not so tight!
Frankly, I'd like to choke you with it.
♪ Onward Christian soldiers ♪
♪ Marching... ♪
I am so happy for you, Murphy.
Aah! Jesus! Careful!
Yes. Please, be careful.
We have to look after him.
He has been through a great ordeal.
Thank you for your advice, Louis.
I'll do my best for your hero.
Meanwhile, revert to your usual practice
of saying and doing nothing.
He doesn't need your support.
You shouldn't have said that to Louis.
He's a good old froggy.
You have an awful tongue on you.
Would you lie down, please?
Aw, come on. What's wrong with you?
We should be celebrating.
Celebrating what, Mr. Murphy?
Your arrival here
or the death of those Germans?
What's that for?
It's going to put you to sleep.
I hope you sharpened it this time.
Don't make me waste this.
We haven't much of it left.
You wouldn't have a drop of something?
No.
Ah, no whiskey in the house.
No light in the window.
No welcome at the door.
Call me Walter.
What are you grinning for?
Give us a kiss.
Good night, Mr. Murphy.
♪ And what's it to anyone ♪
♪ Whether or no ♪
♪ Whether I'm lazy ♪
♪ Or whether I'm through? ♪
DR. HAYDEN: Louis!
I'm sorry, Louis.
Forgive me. I was upset.
That Murphy seems to affect us all.
It's not necessary to discuss it.
We have been friends for a long time.
I didn't mean what I said.
Without you...
Good night, Louis.
Feuer!
Aah! Aah!
( Speaking foreign language )
( speaking German )
No!
( Speaking foreign language )
CAPTAIN LAUCHS: Where is he, doctor?
( Gunfire )
( children crying )
( speaking foreign language )
Mr. Murphy?
( Echoing ) Murphy!
MURPHY: Missis?
Missis?
Murphy?
Here.
I thought I'd sunk her.
I didn't.
No.
Sorry for your trouble.
It's over now.
( Twig snaps )
Louis!
Yeah.
They didn't find you.
Oh, no.
How are you? Sound.
Dr. Hayden?
She's ok.
Submarine attacked the village?
Yes.
But I thought--
Yes, yes! Me, too.
I have to go and help--
Did they touch the barge?
No. Not at all, no.
When's the last time you took her out?
The barge? About 6 years ago.
Actually, it's a funny story because--
Come on.
( Speaking foreign language )
( piano playing on radio )
RADIO ANNOUNCER: this is London calling.
Here is a recorded dispatch from Chester Wilmot.
The dispatch comes from Germany.
Wilmot: hello, B.B.C.
This is Chester Wilmot
Speaking from a B.B.C. Transmitter
in northern Germany.
This afternoon at 6:30 British Double Summer Time
at Field Marshal Montgomery's tactical headquarters,
German plenipotentiaries signed the document
which will end the war in Europe
for the 21st Army Group
at 8:00 tomorrow morning.
That means the threat...
( radio announcer speaking German )
( radio announcer speaking Spanish )
WINSTON CHURCHILL: The German war is
therefore at an end.
After years of intense--
( radio falls on floor )
Why did you do that?
Another bloody bullfight.
Ole, ole, ole!
Driving me crackers!
What the hell are we doing?
I'm going to kill that submarine.
With what?
I'm gonna ram her with this.
With my house?
Ah, don't fret.
The bullets'll bounce off her.
Will they bounce off people?
Mr. Murphy!
( Speaking foreign language )
Mr. Murphy!
The war is over!
Mr. Murphy!
DR. HAYDEN: Louis!
Louis!
The war is over!
She is shouting something!
Another flaming lecture!
Now get down and check the engine!
Aha! I can operate from here!
Will you just check the filthy things?
( Speaking foreign language )
( speaking German )
English!
He can't be talking to me.
War ends! Finished!
( Speaking German )
( captain speaking German )
Turn ship, or I attack!
What will he do?
Pull out and try setting up a torpedo.
But...
you said nothing about torpedo.
Must have forgot.
War over!
Germany surrendered!
Now, give me full speed when I ask for it
and then reverse.
But didn't you hear? The war is over.
Their war, not mine.
The war is--
full speed!
( Speaking German )
( alarm ringing )
( speaking German )
Feuer!
( Captain speaking German )
Here it comes.
Full ahead! Port!
Missed.
It's going to hit the beach!
( Alarm sounding )
Come on, my son.
( Speaking German )
Come on, my son.
Come on, my son!
Missed the bastard!
3 feet!
Full reverse, starboard!
What more can we do?
I'm going to follow him!
Follow him? Here?
There's nothing else I can do!
Now, full ahead!
Louis.
Cut the engines.
What does it mean?
I don't know.
Could be blowing air from his tanks.
He's run--
he's--he's run his bow on the bank!
We have him, Louis!
Full speed ahead! We have the bastard!
( Engine starting )
Come on!
( Speaking German )
( speaking German )
Hey!
You're running aground!
Lower the jib!
Come on! Come on!
More wire!
Give me more wire!
What you doing?
Her lungs are bursting.
He's not even in trouble!
They shall die in peace!
He'll get out!
I bet we'll never find him!
Possibly. Possibly not.
I have done enough!
Louis!
I'm not able on me own!
You're a small and lonely man, Murphy!
Like me!
The world will never build us a monument!
The difference is I know that!
( Speaking German )
( motor stops )
( speaking German )
( barge approaching )
( barge engine stops )
( explosion )
I have ya!
( Yelling in German )
Jesus!
♪ She's got me walking on the tip of my toes ♪
♪ And my hat's on the side of my head ♪
♪ All of my troubles are mended ♪
♪ She's my needle and thread ♪
♪ She's got me walking on the tip of my toes ♪
♪ And my hat's on the side of my head ♪
♪ Oh, that wonderful smile ♪
♪ Oh, I fell from the start ♪
♪ You should listen awhile ♪
♪ To the pump-pumping of my poor old heart ♪
♪ We've got a wonderful future ♪
♪ One that's rosy and red ♪
♪ She's got me walking on the tip of my toes ♪
♪ And my hat's on the side of my head ♪